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GaryMrMets
08-08-2002, 03:33 PM
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Keep Your Eyes on Your Own Paper: Our Coolest High School Flicks of All Time

by Kimberly Potts

Okay, so a lot has changed over the years. But for high schoolers, one thing remains constant: Those rascally kids are always struggling against something or other.

In the '50s, it was a fight against the grown-ups who hated that jungle music known as rock 'n' roll. In the '60s, it was against all that adult stuff like wars and bombs. And in the decades since, teens have largely been pitted against one another in the pursuit of high ranking on the social-status pole.

Happily, moviedom has faithfully reflected this slice of adolescent life, with classic tales of geek versus chic, brains versus brawn and the evergreen students versus faculty. Indeed, all you ever really needed to know in high school, you learned at the movies.

So, take a look at our cheat sheets on the 10 coolest clique flicks ever made. Maybe your favorite made the grade.

#10 Valley Girl (1983)

"She's cool. He's hot. She's from the Valley. He's not."
But are the Romeo and Juliet of Southern California destined to couple anyway? Fer sure, like, totally!

In Nicolas Cage's first leading role, he's Randy the Hollywood rocker, who crashes a preppy party and meets the total Val chick Julie (Deborah Foreman). Julie's just dumped Val dude Tommy, and she's lookin' for love. So, despite her friends' objections, she finds herself, like, smitten to the max with this punk hunk.

Part peer-pressure parable, part love story, this is basically a pretty cheesy flick with one overwhelmingly endearing quality: It's the film of record for documenting the brief yet storied history of the legendary pop-culture blip known as the "Valley Girl" (all due respect, of course, to Moon Unit Zappa and her anthem)--and a, like, totally tubular one at that.

I'm soooo sure.
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#9 Rock 'n' Roll High School (1979)

Gabba gabba...Hey! They're burning all the Ramones records!
Evil ***** Principal Togar (played by former Velvet Underground pal Mary Waronov) is adamant in her proclamation that there be "no more rock 'n' roll!" at Vince Lombardi High.

But that stomps the buzz of cool grrl Riff Randell (Carrie costar and ex-Mrs. Dennis Quaid, P.J. Soles), who likes nothing more than cranking up records over the loudspeaker and skipping school to camp out for Ramones concert tickets.

The cult classic, which started out as Disco High until director-writer Allan Arkush cast the punk-rockin' Ramones, features one of the quintessential teenybopper fantasies--a panty-clad Riff getting serenaded by her celebrity heartthrob, none other than Mr. Joey Ramone.

There's also a great concert sequence (which translates into a great soundtrack), but the film's apogee has to be the final scene, in which the Lombardi radicals stage a raucous revolution against Miss Togar and her Hitler-esque tactics to get them to pipe down. Hell hath no fury (or fire, in this instance) like a rock 'n' roll fanatic scorned!
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#8 Dazed and Confused (1993)

When a weary teen has had enough of the big, bad world, he should hark back the following pithy words of encouragement:
"The older you get, the more rules they are going to try and get you to follow. You just gotta keep on livin', man, L-I-V-I-N!"

Okay, so spelling's not his forte, but Wooderson's (Matthew McConaughey) perpetually toked philosophy makes total sense to the gaggle of equally laced high schoolers who follow him around.

Director Richard Linklater's stoner Pied Piper is but one of the colorful, doobie-sparkin' savants cruising aimlessly in search of the next beer party while riffing nostalgic about random topics ranging from the intricacies behind Gilligan's Island to the hipness of Martha Washington.

Dazed succeeds as a harbinger of future stars (McConaughey, Ben Affleck, Renée Zellweger, Adam Goldberg, Jason London and Parker Posey all made appearances), and also paints a perfect portrait of high schoolers in 1976, who, in all their infinite (if stoned) wisdom, manage to convey the wise anti-stress message: Don't worry. Be hippie.
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#7 American Graffiti (1973)

Long before he was conjuring galaxies far, far away and creating irksome characters like Jar Jar, George Lucas was examining the middle-American teenage condition. It wasn't a pretty sight.
Bored small-town nights with nothing to do but cruise the same strip of road over and over again are hallmarks not only of Lucas' own adolescence but of his teen-angst opus known as American Graffiti.

The night before they're set to scoot off to college, buddies Kurt (Richard Dreyfus) and Steve (Ron Howard), and Steve's girlfriend/Kurt's sister Laurie (Cindy Williams), take one last nostalgic spin around their hometown.

Steve is anxious to leave both home and, at first, his girlfriend behind, while a frightened Kurt is toying with staying put instead of facing the unknown. Laurie is upset about losing both her beau and her bro.

Also out for a ride are Terry "The Toad" Fields, a dateless wonder suddenly in possession of hot wheels; Milner, an older hanger-on who drives around in a souped-up racer (think Fonzie sans the leather jacket); and cocky Bob Falfa (Harrison Ford), who's about to get knocked down a notch or two.

Lucas' much-heralded flick, which spawned a 1979 sequel with most of the original cast (including Ford), is a cohesive melding of coming-of-age tale, rebellion against small-town life and nostalgic, '60s period piece that proves not only is breaking up hard to do, growing up is hard to do, too.
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#6 My Bodyguard (1980)

Chris Makepeace (a prime "where is he now" candidate, if ever there was one) plays Cliff Peache, a physically underdeveloped kid who transfers from his upscale Chicago prep academy to a rough-and-tumble public high school.
A quick study, Cliff notes that his new school is ruled by a gang of low-rent ruffians--led by Moody (a young Matt Dillon)--who exhalt in extorting lunch money from their intimidated classmates. After suffering mega humilitation for refusing to capitulate, our hero does the only logical thing and employs a bodyguard to keep him not only safe but fed.

Thing is, there's more to silent giant Ricky Linderman (a wonderful Adam Baldwin) than bodyguarding and all those rampant rumors that he's shot a student, broken a teacher's leg and popped out a classmate's eyeball. A tragedy had befallen Linderman's little brother, so it's up to Cliff, Cliff's eccentric grandma (Ruth Gordon) and the morale boost of building his own motorcycle to drag Linderman back among the living.

The film, which notably marks the big-screen debuts of Joan Cusack and Jennifer Beals, is simple, sweet and more than a little mawkish (open the floodgates, baby), but even the improbable Rocky-like ending takes a backseat to how great it feels to see the good guys win.
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#5 Clueless (1995)

Cher Horowitz is rich, popular and, according to her litigator daddy, "the most beautiful girl in all of Beverly Hills." So, what's the problem?
Boredom. Cher's biggest woes (and, admittedly, the romp's only real plot) stem from entanglements that ensue when she tries to busy herself with rearranging the lives of everyone around her--like when she makes over her frumpy friend Tai, organizes a Pismo Beach Disaster Relief Team and plays matchmaker to a pair of lonely-heart teachers.

Sure, her motives are not always pure (she hopes the teacher tango will lead to good grades), but there are flashes of Cher's humanitarian self. Why else would she benevolently hand down last season's designer duds to Lucy the maid?

Directed by Fast Times at Ridgemont High's Amy Heckerling, Clueless takes Jane Austen's Emma and reworks it into 1990s high school. Gone are elegant prose and Elizabethan ensembles in this world of killer threads, booming soundtracks, cell phones and witty one-liners.

As with the novel's heroine, this seemingly spoiled, selfish brat turns out to be a do-gooder in snobby, rich girl's computer-chosen clothing.

Clueless? We think not.
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GaryMrMets
08-08-2002, 03:34 PM
#4 Sixteen Candles (1984)

"What's happenin', hot stuff?" asks "the very strange Chinaman in Mike's room."
Not a lot.

So far, there hasn't been anything sweet about Samantha Baker's (Molly Ringwald) 16th birthday.

Her family has spaced out on the date, her sister's impending nuptials are stealing the spotlight, she's been "felt up" by one grandma and goosed by the other and she's in unrequited love with Jake (Michael Schoeffling), the high school hottie who doesn't even know she's alive.

As if things weren't insufferable enough, "Farmer Ted," the geekiest guy in school (Anthony Michael Hall, in a role that almost went to Jim Carrey), has decided he'll stop at nothing to make her his.

In the first of three John Hughes-directed performances, Ringwald's birthday girl Sam is at once the underclassman longing for the senior stud, the stereotypical middle child longing for acceptance from her parents and the geek longing to be popular.

Happily, as things are how want them to be in Hughesian romps, and sometimes (we hope) in real life, too, all's well that ends well.

Samantha makes a couple of new friends in Ted the Geek and exchange student Long Duk Dong, finally gets her birthday cake--and wish as well--in the oh so handsome form of "the boy," Jake.

Corny? Absolutely. Eternally watchable? Even more so.
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#3 Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)

"All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz and I'm fine." Not exactly words of wisdom, yet to an entire generation, they conjure a cult classic.
When Cameron Crowe, at the ripe age of 22, "infiltrated" a high school as a senior transfer student to uncover the "values, manners, morals and attitudes of students" for an exposé he'd later call Fast Times at Ridgemont High, he couldn't have known he'd soon turn the idea into a screenplay for one of the most beloved (and quoted) movies of all time.

With its frank and hilarious discussions about sex (including the oft-replicated, simulated-oral-sex scene); goofy yet endearing characters like stoned surfer dude Jeff Spicoli (Sean Penn), too-cool-for-high-school babe Linda Barrett (Phoebe Cates in her first role), siblings Brad and Stacy Hamilton (Judge Reinhold and Jennifer Jason Leigh) and the mallrat, Rat; plus, the eclectic soundtrack (featuring a gamut of talent ranging from Jackson Browne to Jimmy Buffet to Joe Walsh ), Fast Times tapped into a common consciousness. (Cates' topless scene didn't thwart theatergoers either.)

Though the clothes, hair and even the mall are all more than a bit dated (the real-life Sherman Oaks Galleria featured in the movie closed March 1999), who doesn't wax sentimental when thinking about the blitzed-out Spicolis or a just-trying-to-fit-in Stacys from their own pasts?

Aloha, Mr. Hand.
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#2 Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

John Hughes...John Hughes...John Hughes?
Another John Hughes movie on the list, you say? Hey, we had to struggle to narrow it down to just two. (After all there's also The Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink, Weird Science and Some Kind of Wonderful to consider...)

But Ferris, the adventures of "one man's struggle to take it easy," as the movie's poster proclaimed, is universally appealing, fast, funny and so engrained in our pop culture (a sequel is even rumored) that almost 15 years later, Ben Stein is still getting mileage (and Clear Eyes commercials) out of his relatively minor schtick as the monotoned econ teacher. Anyone?

Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick), a cocky, quirky senior given to breaking the fourth wall (speaking directly to the camera), just wanted one more carefree day of adventure with his hypochondriac pal Cameron (Spin City's Alan Ruck) and girlfriend Sloane (Mia Sara).

But if the cat's gonna play, he's going to first have to outsmart his parents, his bitter sister Jeanie (Jennifer Grey) and his persnickety principal Mr. Rooney--and eke out another excused absence from school.

No machination is too farfetched for our boy Ferris, who has a seemingly endless supply of cool and calm, even when it seems like "the jig is up," as Rooney often insists.

Not so fast, Mr. Rooney. As Ferris proves, "Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive."

Which is clearly why, 14 years later, this movie still delivers.
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#1
Risky Business (1983)

Cue the music (Bob Seger's "Old Time Rock and Roll," of course). Enter tighty-whitey-clad Joel Goodson...and the rest is, well, teen-movie history.
Poor Joel--he's just letting off a little steam. All the guy wants is to finish his Future Business Entrepreneurs project and get into Princeton. Shouldn't be too difficult for a studious, straight-and-narrow type like him, right? Ummm...not exactly.

The uptight teen (played to perfection by a nubile Tom Cruise in his first high-profile leading role) turns a personality corner when his parents leave him home alone for a few days. As the film's tagline said, "Meet the model son who's been good too long."

No Macaulay Culkin antics here--Joel and his pals mean business.

From cruising (and crashing) his dad's Porsche to utilizing the, er, "services" of call girl Lana (Rebecca De Mornay) to running a makeshift brothel in an effort to make quick car-repair cash to fearlessly facing down Guido the Killer Pimp, our hero takes his pal Miles' advice-- "Sometimes you just gotta say 'what the ****.' "

Of course, in authentic high school movie fashion, all the craziness is ultimately resolved, and Goodson finds not only love with Lana but that "Princeton can use a guy like Joel."

Indeed.
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GaryMrMets
08-08-2002, 03:35 PM
What is your favorite school flick?
American Graffiti
Clueless
Dazed and Confused
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
My Bodyguard
Sixteen Candles
Risky Business
Rock 'n' Roll High School
Valley Girl
Other