Baseball Guru
10-07-2004, 01:23 PM
* Coffee and frozen pizzas can be made on a BBQ grill.
* No matter how many times you flick the switch, lights don't work without electricity.
* Kids can survive 4 days or longer without a video game controller in their hand.
* Cats are even more irritating without power.
* He who has the biggest generator wins.
* Women can actually survive without doing their hair......you just wish they weren't around you.
* A new method of non-lethal torture.....showers without hot water.
* There are a lot more stars in the sky than most people thought.
* TV is an addiction and the withdrawal symptoms are painful. One day at a time.
* A 7 lb bag of ice will chill 6-12 oz (drinks) to a drinkable temperature in 11 minutes, and still keep a 14-pound turkey frozen for 8 more hours.
* There are a lot of trees around here.
* Flood plan drawings on some mortgage documents were seriously wrong.
* Contrary to most Florida natives' beliefs, speed limit on roads without traffic lights does not increase.
* Aluminum siding, while aesthetically pleasing, is definitely not required.
* Just because you're over 21 doesn't mean you can stay out as late as you want. At least that's what the cops told me during a curfew stop.
* Crickets can increase their volume to overcome the sound of 14 generators.
* People will get into a line that has already formed without having any idea what the line is for.
* When required, a Chrysler 300M will float......doesn't steer well, but floats just the same.
* Some things do keep the mailman from his appointed rounds.
* Tele-marketers function no matter what the weather is doing.
* Cell phones work when land lines are down, but only as long as the battery remains charged.
* 27 of your neighbors are fed from a different transformer than you, and they are quick to point that out!
* Laundry hampers were not made to contain such a volume.
* If I had a store that sold only ice, chainsaws, gas, and generators.....I'd be rich.
* The price of a bag of ice rises 200% after a hurricane.
* Your water front property can quickly become someone else's fishing hole.
* Tree service companies are under appreciated.
* I learned what happens when you make fun of another state's blackout.
* MATH 101: 30 days in month, minus 6 days without power equals 30% higher
electric bill ?????
* Drywall is a compound word, take away the "dry" part and it's worthless.
* I can walk a lot farther than I thought.
* No matter how many times you flick the switch, lights don't work without electricity.
* Kids can survive 4 days or longer without a video game controller in their hand.
* Cats are even more irritating without power.
* He who has the biggest generator wins.
* Women can actually survive without doing their hair......you just wish they weren't around you.
* A new method of non-lethal torture.....showers without hot water.
* There are a lot more stars in the sky than most people thought.
* TV is an addiction and the withdrawal symptoms are painful. One day at a time.
* A 7 lb bag of ice will chill 6-12 oz (drinks) to a drinkable temperature in 11 minutes, and still keep a 14-pound turkey frozen for 8 more hours.
* There are a lot of trees around here.
* Flood plan drawings on some mortgage documents were seriously wrong.
* Contrary to most Florida natives' beliefs, speed limit on roads without traffic lights does not increase.
* Aluminum siding, while aesthetically pleasing, is definitely not required.
* Just because you're over 21 doesn't mean you can stay out as late as you want. At least that's what the cops told me during a curfew stop.
* Crickets can increase their volume to overcome the sound of 14 generators.
* People will get into a line that has already formed without having any idea what the line is for.
* When required, a Chrysler 300M will float......doesn't steer well, but floats just the same.
* Some things do keep the mailman from his appointed rounds.
* Tele-marketers function no matter what the weather is doing.
* Cell phones work when land lines are down, but only as long as the battery remains charged.
* 27 of your neighbors are fed from a different transformer than you, and they are quick to point that out!
* Laundry hampers were not made to contain such a volume.
* If I had a store that sold only ice, chainsaws, gas, and generators.....I'd be rich.
* The price of a bag of ice rises 200% after a hurricane.
* Your water front property can quickly become someone else's fishing hole.
* Tree service companies are under appreciated.
* I learned what happens when you make fun of another state's blackout.
* MATH 101: 30 days in month, minus 6 days without power equals 30% higher
electric bill ?????
* Drywall is a compound word, take away the "dry" part and it's worthless.
* I can walk a lot farther than I thought.