GaryMrMets
06-16-2002, 01:17 PM
http://newyork.mets.mlb.com/nasapp/mlb/kc/news/kc_news.jsp?ymd=20020611&content_id=50490&vkey=news_kc&fext=.jsp
06/11/2002 8:07 pm ET
Father's Day: Randa on being dad
Third baseman savors precious time with sons
By Robert Falkoff / MLB.com
Kansas City Royals third baseman Joe Randa, 32, and wife Bethany are the proud parents of two sons: Jacob turns 4 in December and Justin turns 2 in October. Randa, who at an early age went through the pain of seeing his parents divorce, says that experience ultimately led him to strive to become the best parent he can be. With Father's Day approaching, MLB.com caught up with Randa recently to get his insights on fatherhood.
MLB.com: What was the biggest change in your life after becoming a father?
Joe Randa: Probably the responsibility. When you don't have any kids and it's just you and your wife, you don't have so much to concern yourself with in terms of scheduling. You are just thinking about your wife. But once you have a child, it really changes everything. A lot more of your thought process goes into the child himself.
MLB.com: Being a professional ballplayer, how difficult a juggling act is it to balance family life and your professional life?
Randa: Well, it definitely gets harder and harder as the months and the years go on. As your children get older, they get more knowledgeable of what's going on. My oldest son now is at the phase where he stands in front of the door and doesn't want me to leave the house. It does become difficult when you go on the road. Both my sons know when I'm going to be on a road trip. They see me packing my bags and ask where I'm going. They ask if I'm going on an airplane. It's hard when you have to pack up and leave for seven to 10 days. Things change. By the time you get back, they might be saying different words. They might have grown a bit or gotten in some teeth. As a father, I don't want to miss those things.
MLB.com: Did you want to wait until your baseball career reached a certain level before starting a family?
Randa: We did. We definitely wanted to have some stability. First of all, where we were going to live. Secondly, to have a house. I've really been blessed to have played out of my own house the last four years and hopefully it'll be longer than that. A lot of guys have to move their families down to Spring Training and move them into the cities where they are playing. I've been fortunate to come back to my own home and that makes it easier for my family. A lot of people plan and prepare when to have a family and hope everything works out perfectly. Sometimes, it doesn't work out that way. It worked out for us, but we kind of wish now we had started a little earlier, so we could be a little bit younger when our kids were growing up.
MLB.com: When you reflect on your own childhood, how did that shape you in terms of becoming the parent you are today?
Randa: My parents divorced when I was young and I've looked at a lot of those different scenarios -- on things that hurt me as a child and not wanting to do that to my children. It has made me a better father, it has made me closer to my kids. It has made me just really focus more on being there for them all the time. A lot of people go through difficult childhoods, but I've tried to mold it and learn from the feelings and the things that I had as a kid growing up. There was a lot of pain and loneliness. I had two older sisters and if it hadn't been for my older sisters and the strength of my mom, our family might not have been raised the way we were. My mom remarried and then my stepfather took over and helped out a lot. But I remember a lot of the pain at the time. The kids really take the biggest hit out of a divorce. That was a trying time for me as a child, but it has made me a better parent.
MLB.com: Do your boys play sports?
Randa: They do. They play everything, not just baseball. That's the way I was when I was growing up. I loved tennis, football, basketball. It wasn't just baseball. That's what I'd really like to instill in my kids. Just because I play baseball, that doesn't mean they have to play baseball or that should be the only thing they do. We've got a football, a basketball, a soccer ball, a volleyball. We've got trucks. If they want to paint and color, that's what we'll do. Baseball is a part of it for them. I think my wife is becoming a better pitcher than I am because she throws to them so much. They are really getting into hitting off the tee and chasing balls around. They are into the game of baseball, but they also enjoy doing a bunch of other stuff.
MLB.com: How much baseball instruction at this point do you feel compelled to give them?
Randa: I personally don't feel it's that important. I didn't really have good instruction until I was in college. Nobody ever forced the game of baseball on me. It was just something I naturally developed an interest in and then it went from there. I think that's the route I want to impress upon my children: Here are some opportunities for you. Run with whatever you want and we'll be there to support you and give you all the advantages we can in whatever activity you may choose.
MLB.com: You're about to get into the Little League phase. With all the stories about overzealous parents taking the fun out of Little League, do you have any thoughts about that topic?
Randa: Yeah, I do. I want to be on the outside looking in. I'm going to be in the stands emphasizing that the kids are there to have fun. If they make mistakes, they make mistakes. It's not the end of the world. It's sad when the parents basically live through their children. I just want to see them have a smile on their face when I take them home after the game. That's all that matters to me. Just to be able to sit and watch the kids have fun will hopefully be the biggest joy of my life. And hopefully, a bunch of other parents I'm sitting around will feel the same way.
MLB.com: Would you want your children to become pro athletes?
Randa: I'm definitely not going to push them. If they develop an interest, then of course I'll be there to support them. But by no means am I going to stick a bat and glove in front of their face and say this is the road you are supposed to take because supposedly you might have it in your genes. I don't believe in that. I'd love them just as much if they decided to work in a department store or work for the post office or whatever.
MLB.com: The Royals will be playing in St. Louis on Father's Day. Will your sons be there with you?
Randa: Yeah, they'll be there. It will be a special day. To be able to wake up on that Sunday morning and have them there will be a nice feeling. But then, right after the game we have to fly to Montreal. I'll enjoy the morning. Then in the evening, I'll be lonely and they'll be with mom. It goes with the job. I get a couple of hours on Father's Day morning to see them and hug them. It'll be a good morning.
Robert Falkoff covers the Royals for MLB.com. This story was not subject to the approval of Major League Baseball or is clubs.
http://newyork.mets.mlb.com/images/2002/05/26/TE5Ru9bP.jpg
Joe Randa struggles to find a balance between work and his family. (Ed Zurga/AP)
06/11/2002 8:07 pm ET
Father's Day: Randa on being dad
Third baseman savors precious time with sons
By Robert Falkoff / MLB.com
Kansas City Royals third baseman Joe Randa, 32, and wife Bethany are the proud parents of two sons: Jacob turns 4 in December and Justin turns 2 in October. Randa, who at an early age went through the pain of seeing his parents divorce, says that experience ultimately led him to strive to become the best parent he can be. With Father's Day approaching, MLB.com caught up with Randa recently to get his insights on fatherhood.
MLB.com: What was the biggest change in your life after becoming a father?
Joe Randa: Probably the responsibility. When you don't have any kids and it's just you and your wife, you don't have so much to concern yourself with in terms of scheduling. You are just thinking about your wife. But once you have a child, it really changes everything. A lot more of your thought process goes into the child himself.
MLB.com: Being a professional ballplayer, how difficult a juggling act is it to balance family life and your professional life?
Randa: Well, it definitely gets harder and harder as the months and the years go on. As your children get older, they get more knowledgeable of what's going on. My oldest son now is at the phase where he stands in front of the door and doesn't want me to leave the house. It does become difficult when you go on the road. Both my sons know when I'm going to be on a road trip. They see me packing my bags and ask where I'm going. They ask if I'm going on an airplane. It's hard when you have to pack up and leave for seven to 10 days. Things change. By the time you get back, they might be saying different words. They might have grown a bit or gotten in some teeth. As a father, I don't want to miss those things.
MLB.com: Did you want to wait until your baseball career reached a certain level before starting a family?
Randa: We did. We definitely wanted to have some stability. First of all, where we were going to live. Secondly, to have a house. I've really been blessed to have played out of my own house the last four years and hopefully it'll be longer than that. A lot of guys have to move their families down to Spring Training and move them into the cities where they are playing. I've been fortunate to come back to my own home and that makes it easier for my family. A lot of people plan and prepare when to have a family and hope everything works out perfectly. Sometimes, it doesn't work out that way. It worked out for us, but we kind of wish now we had started a little earlier, so we could be a little bit younger when our kids were growing up.
MLB.com: When you reflect on your own childhood, how did that shape you in terms of becoming the parent you are today?
Randa: My parents divorced when I was young and I've looked at a lot of those different scenarios -- on things that hurt me as a child and not wanting to do that to my children. It has made me a better father, it has made me closer to my kids. It has made me just really focus more on being there for them all the time. A lot of people go through difficult childhoods, but I've tried to mold it and learn from the feelings and the things that I had as a kid growing up. There was a lot of pain and loneliness. I had two older sisters and if it hadn't been for my older sisters and the strength of my mom, our family might not have been raised the way we were. My mom remarried and then my stepfather took over and helped out a lot. But I remember a lot of the pain at the time. The kids really take the biggest hit out of a divorce. That was a trying time for me as a child, but it has made me a better parent.
MLB.com: Do your boys play sports?
Randa: They do. They play everything, not just baseball. That's the way I was when I was growing up. I loved tennis, football, basketball. It wasn't just baseball. That's what I'd really like to instill in my kids. Just because I play baseball, that doesn't mean they have to play baseball or that should be the only thing they do. We've got a football, a basketball, a soccer ball, a volleyball. We've got trucks. If they want to paint and color, that's what we'll do. Baseball is a part of it for them. I think my wife is becoming a better pitcher than I am because she throws to them so much. They are really getting into hitting off the tee and chasing balls around. They are into the game of baseball, but they also enjoy doing a bunch of other stuff.
MLB.com: How much baseball instruction at this point do you feel compelled to give them?
Randa: I personally don't feel it's that important. I didn't really have good instruction until I was in college. Nobody ever forced the game of baseball on me. It was just something I naturally developed an interest in and then it went from there. I think that's the route I want to impress upon my children: Here are some opportunities for you. Run with whatever you want and we'll be there to support you and give you all the advantages we can in whatever activity you may choose.
MLB.com: You're about to get into the Little League phase. With all the stories about overzealous parents taking the fun out of Little League, do you have any thoughts about that topic?
Randa: Yeah, I do. I want to be on the outside looking in. I'm going to be in the stands emphasizing that the kids are there to have fun. If they make mistakes, they make mistakes. It's not the end of the world. It's sad when the parents basically live through their children. I just want to see them have a smile on their face when I take them home after the game. That's all that matters to me. Just to be able to sit and watch the kids have fun will hopefully be the biggest joy of my life. And hopefully, a bunch of other parents I'm sitting around will feel the same way.
MLB.com: Would you want your children to become pro athletes?
Randa: I'm definitely not going to push them. If they develop an interest, then of course I'll be there to support them. But by no means am I going to stick a bat and glove in front of their face and say this is the road you are supposed to take because supposedly you might have it in your genes. I don't believe in that. I'd love them just as much if they decided to work in a department store or work for the post office or whatever.
MLB.com: The Royals will be playing in St. Louis on Father's Day. Will your sons be there with you?
Randa: Yeah, they'll be there. It will be a special day. To be able to wake up on that Sunday morning and have them there will be a nice feeling. But then, right after the game we have to fly to Montreal. I'll enjoy the morning. Then in the evening, I'll be lonely and they'll be with mom. It goes with the job. I get a couple of hours on Father's Day morning to see them and hug them. It'll be a good morning.
Robert Falkoff covers the Royals for MLB.com. This story was not subject to the approval of Major League Baseball or is clubs.
http://newyork.mets.mlb.com/images/2002/05/26/TE5Ru9bP.jpg
Joe Randa struggles to find a balance between work and his family. (Ed Zurga/AP)